8 Key Practices for a Balanced 2024: Embracing Learning, Health, and Intentionality for Success

Jackie - 00:00:10:

You're listening to the Diversity Beyond the Checkbox podcast brought to you by the the Diversity Movement. I'm your host, Jackie Ferguson, author, speaker, and human rights advocate. On this show, I'm talking to trailblazers, game changers, and glass ceiling breakers who share their inspiring stories and insights on business inclusion and personal development. Thank you for downloading this episode. I am truly grateful for you. Enjoy the show. Thanks for tuning in to the Diversity Beyond the Checkbox podcast. We are already 112th of the way through 2024. Can you believe it? I can. I think it was Gretchen Rubin that said, The days are long, but the years are short. On this episode, I'm going to change the format a little. I'm going to share eight things to slow down for in 2024. I've interviewed more than 100 incredible individuals. And here are some of the learnings from them and from the amazing people that I know in my life. I'm also quickly approaching a big birthday. So there are a lot of life lessons that I've learned from experience. From losing people in my life, from removing myself from bad situations, from taking risks and being cautious, and from just being an observer of life and people. So if you're ready, let's jump in. One, slow down for your loved ones, those few individuals. That pour love and joy into you. We're so used to moving through our day in the presence of our loved ones, but thinking about 10 other things, scrolling through our phones, working and half listening. Just stop. Make time to hear the people that love you. Get to know them better. Ask questions. Whether you're talking to a five-year-old or a 95-year-old, look them in the eyes, connect with them, hold their hand. Turn off the TV and have an undisrupted meal. We all know that life is fleeting and so fragile. There will be a time you wished you slowed down for those that you love. So do it today. For those of us who have lost someone important. One of the things... That you try to remember. Is that very last interaction. How much more present? Would you be if you knew? That was the last time you'd see them or hold them or talk to them. Would you study their face, their smile? But you really hear their laugh. You would. So do that. Make that time matter. The second thing is slow down for yourself. In the next week, take a quiet hour alone and think about what brings you personal joy and recharges you. Is it a hobby or activity? Is it travel? Is it a hot bath? Is it just being alone? So often we prioritize ourselves last when we should be making ourselves important. We take time to recharge, get rest, and take care of ourselves. We show up better in every aspect of our lives. If we're exhausted, burnt out, a step behind, or not doing the things that we love, we can't give our best to our family, to our job, or anything else in our lives. Make yourself important. No one knows better than you what you need. You don't have to be a superhero. And I'll say that again. You don't have to be a superhero. Enlist others around you to help you get those breaks that you need. Three, slow down for learning. Whether it's language, a new skill, maybe it's understanding more about how other people navigate the world differently from you. Slow down to learn something new or improve something you already do. Get better at something. Expand your perspectives. And when you quite literally slow down for learning by studying consistently over a longer period of time rather than... Cramming information in. Studies show that you retain up to 90% of what you've learned and you can build on that. So what are you committed to learning this year? And in that same vein, Take risks. Stop playing it safe. Move out of your comfort zone. Apply for that big new job or start laying the foundation for entrepreneurship or move to that new town. We often get complacent in our routines. How many of us drive to work? For those of us that still do, right? And you don't remember how you got there. You're thinking about a hundred different things and you go into autopilot. Well, our lives can be like that as well. Shake it up. Do something that scares you a little. I know I talk about... This a lot with the the Diversity Movement and my fear of public speaking, but y'all. Podcast scared me. I thought I was going to mess it up. And then moving into public speaking to thousands of people around the world, both online and in person, it was terrifying. But honestly, people give you grace to be human. And this personal growth has changed my whole career. 4. Slow down for health. Stop being too busy for those doctor's visits. Have we pushed off the dentist yet again? Does something just feel off? Don't be too busy to take care of yourself through caring and competent healthcare professionals. And I say that because make sure that they're slowing down with you as well, right? Not running in. Telling you to take an aspirin and billing your insurance. You want someone who's going to take your healthcare seriously. Alongside you. Practice mindfulness as part of slowing down for health. Pausing in the day is a great way to recharge. Have you ever practiced yoga or meditation? I have, and I have to tell you, it was really hard getting my mind to slow down. So many of us live rushing around. Chaotically from the time we wake up to the time we lay our heads down, we increase our stress and anxiety. Determine what really needs to get done, right? Does that load of laundry need to be folded or is time better spent listening to music before bed? Can you afford to get a little bit of help from me? This was a game changer. In building a business, I always felt a step behind with things at home. Getting some help there made all the difference. And if that's not in your budget, It's okay. To be comfortable with not picking up toys or dusting the tables. Use that time for yourself or your loved ones. Slowing down to eat aids in digestion. I know so many of us are eating on the go or cramming something in between meetings. But we're moving between work and kids' sports events and then dinner and then house chores. But try to schedule in time to eat balanced meals and actually enjoy them. Actually taste them. That's one of my favorite things to do, to cook a meal. Decompress for my day and then have a meal with the people that I love. TV off. And that's a good way. For me to not only recharge, but to spend that quality time. Five, slow down to give back. And you might be saying, Jackie, you just told us it's okay to leave things be, and now you want us to volunteer, right? Well, maybe. But there are a lot of ways to give back. It could be finding a cause to support monetarily. Can you share a skill or a time hack with another person at work? It could be just being intentional about offering a smile or a kind word to someone else. Don't hold those lovely thoughts about other people in your head. We do that so often. Share them. You definitely can make someone's day with it. We know this. Think about a compliment that lifted your spirit for the whole day or a week even. Just slow down and give to someone else on a regular basis. It will definitely make you feel warm and good on the inside. Sex. Slow down to make decisions. Taking time for slow decision-making allows for more careful consideration of all available options. When decisions are made too quickly, it's easy to overlook important factors or potential pitfalls. Slower decision-making encourages... Critical thinking and collaboration. Have you thought all the way around the idea? That's so important. For me, one of the best ways to do this is through the Six Thinking Hats framework by Edward De Bono. I've used this since I was asked by a CEO to learn it more than 13 years ago, and it's really worked. We all have a way of thinking about an idea or a problem. Do we go optimistic first and rush into a plan? Do we consider the risks first and never execute a plan? The Six Thinking Hats helps to think all the way around the thing, right? Whatever the thing is for you. From how do we... Feel emotionally about it, to the risks, to the benefits and the process and so much more. I'm certainly not being paid by Edward De Bono, but I'm totally open to it if he's listening to this podcast. But that's a great way to think around a problem. Also, have you sought outside input from people you trust? Maybe there's a perspective or a consequence that you haven't considered. Don't neglect your intuition in the decision-making process. That remains important. But also careful deliberation. Allows you to... Analyze a situation or decision to arrive at the best outcome for you. Even at work, slowing down can make you more productive. That sounds a little backward, but when you rush and hurry through your work, you're more likely to make mistakes and miss things. And it forces you to go back on items you could have just gotten right the first time. So going slow and enjoying the moment allows you to bring. Your best energy and mental focus to your work. Seven, slow down to listen. Earlier this month, I had a two-part episode with Oscar Trimbley where we talked about deep listening. He shared to slow down your breathing to be able to listen better, to be... Present and observe the unspoken communication. And the unspoken part is most of the communication. So when you slow down to listen, you can better understand a person's intent. And perhaps even their real motivation in communicating. Digging into this has helped me personally in my marriage. Over the past year, my husband and I have really slowed down to understand our own motivation and those of our partner. You know, whether I'm feeling, am I feeling afraid? Am I feeling insecure? Am I exhausted? Am I hungry? That's a real thing, y'all. Am I just amped up from another situation, right? Getting to the root of it. Helps us not to villainize the other person, but to understand them and exhibit more patience. And finally, slow down to slow down. Be an observer. In many countries, life is not as harried as it is in the U.S. We sometimes... Find personal value and explaining how busy we are, how hard we work. But the benefits of a slow-paced life are numerous. Can foster a deeper sense of gratitude and fulfillment. Which then cultivates a more balanced and meaningful existence. Sit outside with a beverage of choice and watch the people go by. Hear the sounds. Smell the smells. Be present. I haven't had the privilege of traveling as much as I would like, but I'm changing that this year as I turn 50. And that's one of the things I'm looking forward to experiencing. Some cultures really do wind it down at a certain point. In the day or move at a pace that can frustrate some of us. And I've seen research about them living longer and being happier. One of the ways that we do that is by... Learning how to say no. And sometimes... That's the hardest word. To say in our language. But this tiny word is an essential tool for setting boundaries. Breaking that habit of people pleasing. And prioritizing our own needs. And while it may feel uncomfortable at first, it's helpful to remember that saying no doesn't mean... Being unkind or selfish. We... Really have to abandon those thoughts. It's self-care. My friend, Ruby Brown Herring, a well-being speaker and consultant. Has reminded me in trainings that self-care is not about getting your nails done or booking a massage. It's about intentionally making time for what matters in your life and finding balance. And you can't find balance if you're agreeing to every request all the time between all the things you're responsible for and all the people you're responsible to. There is a skill. To saying no, though. I often hear the phrase, no is a complete sentence. And sometimes that's right. But I prefer a little bit of an explanation, not an over explanation, but maybe a... Thank you for inviting me, but this week has been so hectic. I need to just take the pace down a notch and rest this weekend. People get that. And they respect it too, even if they're a little disappointed in the moment. It's not something that they'll look back on in 10 years and say, I'm so disappointed that Jackie didn't come to my dinner party. But you may look back in 10 years and say, what did I do that brought me peace and happiness and moved me toward? My most important goals. Why is slowing down so important? When you live at a constant breakneck pace, it takes a huge toll. On your mental health, your physical health, your relationships, and your productivity. But when you prioritize slowing down, you can focus on what's truly important in life and let go of the false obligations that distract you. Your kids don't care if there are dishes in the sink when you tuck them into bed. In the long run, you won't remember the one more meeting you squeezed in. Instead of getting home to have dinner with your spouse or work on the thing that brings you joy. Let's stop with these aggressive New Year's Eve resolutions that are driven by our egos and not by our hearts. And to be better to ourselves. And be better for ourselves. As always, everyone, thanks for listening. I'm so grateful that you're here with me. Let me know in the comments or drop me a note if you like this format as part of this show and share if something resonated with you. Until next week, thank you.

Speaker1 - 00:20:16:

Thanks for listening to this episode of Diversity Beyond the Checkbox. If you enjoy the podcast, please take a moment to share it with a friend, leave a rating and review, and subscribe so you'll be reminded when new episodes are released. Become a part of our community on Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, YouTube, and TikTok. This show is proudly part of the Living Corporate Network and was edited and produced by Earfluence. I'm Jackie Ferguson. Take care of yourself and each other.